I was in Homebase this morning, in the decorating aisle to be precise, when I was approached by a middle-aged woman who asked me for my help.

Seeing as how she had asked so politely, I was more than happy to assist.

"I was wondering," she said, pointing to a tin of 2.5 litre paint, "would this be enough to do my decorating?"

I stared at her for a moment, hoping that she was going to follow up with more details, a punchline maybe, but she stared back at me, seemingly anticipating an answer to her question.

"Well," I started, "it depends on how much you're wanting to decorate."

"Oh, it's 2 walls," she responded.

I found myself staring at her again in amazement before stating that she'd have to give me some idea as to how big the walls were.

"Yes of course," she laughed, clearly dawning on her how rediculous her question was. "Not very big."

I explained that she was going to have to be slightly more specific which then led her to try and guess the sizes of the wall, not in measurements but in comparison to the width of the aisle, height of the shelving etc.

On the basis that Homebase were dong a special offer (buy one get 2nd half price) I suggested that she bought 2 of the 2.5 litre tubs (which worked out cheaper than the 5 litre tub) and then if one was enough, she could get a refund on the other.

She thanked me for my time and shuffled off muttering, "right, next i need turps" to herself.